Teaching & Brown Pants!

Well apologies for my lack of blog this week, but it's all got a bit manic in Uni. It all started on Tuesday when I undertook my first teaching class. I decided to follow the old Scouts motto of "Be Prepared" but unfortunately a combination of nerves and the sight of 25 first year students staring at made me turned the event into more of a "Be Scared" occassion!

This may sound really silly, but I went to the lecture theatre early in order to set up for the lesson (tape recorders etc), but when I got there all of the students were already sat in there waiting for me - it threw me completely! My mind went blank and all of my introductory speech went out of the window. I decided the best thing to do was to just get going and start the lecture, even thought I was sure at this point that they could smell my fear. So I started to babble on about how preference works in Conversation Analysis - I had put together loads of hip examples about drinking beer in the SU which I thought would appeal to the younger element in the class (my sad attempt at being in with the youth of today!) but it all went Pete Tong!

I turned around, armed with my dry marker pen to write down the first of the aforementioned examples - "A" I wrote - and then "SHIT" I thought - I was only writing on the overhead projector screen and not the whiteboard! OMG! I quickly grabbed a tissue and rubbed it off - luckily it did, but the damage had been done, the sniggers had started and my dignity compromised :(

I managed to limp through the rest of the lesson, but I felt like a complete idiot.

So on Wednesday, I faced my next class with a bit of trepidation but I am pleased to report that it went a lot better - even though I have a special needs student who talks through the entire lesson and insists on giving me big hugs in the corridor (ah bless!) I felt a lot better and I decided that it was not necessary to wear brown pants to work on Thursday .....

Today I have taught Sociolinguistics to a 2nd year group for 2 hours. I had been told to do a group exercise about qual and quant research methods, as they have to hand in a project plan in a week. I could sense after half an hour that they were bored senseless, so I aborted the mission and we all started talking about their project work instead, which seemed to go down well as 90% of the class didn't have a clue what they wanted to do. Later on in the day, 2 of them came to my office to see me in order to discuss their project work - which I found very strange - it all feels so very grown-up for me to be advising students, I just hope what I told them works out!

Tomorrow I am hosting a data session at Huddersfield Uni for the visiting PhD students at York University which should be fun as they seem like a nice bunch :)

As it is December 1st tomorrow my Christmas decorations have been unleashed. A 15" Christmas tree, two flashing santa's, a sparkly snowman and a £1.99 minature poinsettia plant - very festive! I can't wait for the next 2 weeks to be over as they are going to be very busy, but then I will be coming home - whoopee

Psycho and Grice!

OK so the tablets have kicked in and I'm feeling a lot better (hooray I hear you cry as all you've done is moan about illness) so I should be OK to start teaching on Tuesday. My lesson planning is well under way and I hope to be fully prepared - the only thing I am concerned about is writing on the board. I know this sounds sad but my handwriting has been compared to a pissed spider tap-dancing in ink - so this is something I need to work on!

Today, as well as lesson planning I have decided to dye my hair dark red, which was quite a challenge. For the few of you who may have visited my bathroom in Trethomas you may have noticed certain areas of browny red splodges on my tiles - well that was hair dye. Even though I tried to be careful, I would still end up getting it everywhere. Now Damien Hirst or Tracy Emin (I am sure that is spelt wrong!) would earn a fortune from "Dye on Tiles" but for me it was a case of getting the tile paint out and trying to cover it up.

So when I decided to dye my hair here in my rented accommodation I was concerned. I had two options either: 1. buy four boxes of cling film and cover the entire bathroom or 2. mess up three large bath towels. I chose number 2 and the aforementioned towels are now in the washing machine.

The best thing was washing the dye of after the suggested 30 mins. As I have a stand alone shower cubicle (with white tiles) in order to wash the dye off I had to physically get under the shower - which was really scary as I have just undergone a "Psycho - Janet Leigh " experience. Large amounts of red liquid pouring over me and all over the tiles - not a pretty sight!

Ah well the result of my labour is a dark copper red mullet which I thought appropriate for the festive season - and according to the box it will not fade - as it's L'Oreal - and I'm worth it!

OK back to work - I am presenting a piece to the MA group tomorrow on your friend and mine Mr H. P. Grice (Yes my MA friends he seems to be a permanent fixture in my life). The scary thing is the MA girls keep asking me my advise on stuff - as I am "the PhD student" they are under the completely wrong impression that I know more than them! I have tried to explain to them that I only finished my MA in September but this has not dissuaded them from their false sense of academic adulation - it's all a bit embarrassing as a lot of the time they know far more than me and I am just trying to keep up - yikes!

So many pills so little time!

OK so I am still alive but rattling due to the number of pills I am taking. I have now been given steroid tablets of which I have to take 8 at a time - so with my antibiotics, that's 11 a day - I think I'll be catching up with my Dad soon!

Anyway - other news: I am now officially a part time Lecturer for Hudds Uni, I've had a contract and I start on Tuesday, do they know what they are taking on? Anyway I am starting off gently with 2 classes of 1st year BA students who would like to learn some English in Context stuff - whether they do or not with me is another thing! On Thursday I get the 2nd years and a bit of Sociolinguistics - apparently they will be wanting some advice for their first assignment - well obviously I am the right gal for the job ...... start late, say 6.00pm the night before, lots of black coffee an a good 10 hours stint......print out at 2.00am ...... job done!

Back to illness (briefly) the only good thing about getting no sleep and coughing, is that I've been glued to the re-run of This Life on BBC 2 which is on at a really silly time. Anyway, it made me realise (as if I needed reminding) how fab the series was and I can't wait for the reunion show in the new year - I love Egg and always think of Claire's cat who is named after the aforementioned.

OK I'm off now as it's medication time .... Ciao for now x

Still coughing - but it's Thanksgiving!

OK here's the news........ I'm bored and I don't want to play anymore! I'm not talking about a game of chess here - it's this bl**dy cough! I have finally been given antibiotics by the Doctor but if there's no improvement by Friday I have to go back. I'm not quite sure what else they can do as I haven't heard of a chest and lung amputation/ transplant - but hey ho let's see what happens!

I bumped into the Head of Dept today who has asked me to start teaching on Tuesday, as my supervisor (who is pregnant) needs some help. Under normal circumstances I would be excited at the opportunity, but as I feel like a bag of cr*p and I have an assignment to hand in on Thursday - this news was not received with a lot of Dawny enthusiasm! So next week I have 6 hours teaching Sociolingustics and English and Context, plus a seminar at York Uni and an all day data session at Hudds - plus the assignment - I just hope these tablets kick in quickly!!

Lordy I am moaning like an unpaid prostitute - lets move on!

I would like to end by saying Happy Thanksgiving to my American buddies Anne-Marie and Katharine. I am SO gutted that I can't be at the dinner tomorrow as we had such a great time last year. I just can't believe that a year has gone by so quickly - and SO much has happened!

Anyway - have a great time and today's quote is dedicated to you. It's by the man you love so much George double "W".

"When I met President Bush he asked me what state Wales was in" - Charlotte Church

No TV!!!!

Well I've come home today and the worst thing has happened - my TV is not working - or more to the point, according to a recorded message at NTL "the service to customers in the Huddersfield area is temporarily unavailable"! Oh my word, this is not good, how will I cope without "Deal or No Deal?". To make things worse how long is temporarily? the idea of not having a specific timescale has got me extremely vexed! I think the main problem is, when you are a saddo like me who lives on your own, the TV is like having another voice in the room. With 85% of the programmes on there being complete cr*p, I don't actually watch it, I just like having it on in the background - which thinking about it is something my late Nan used to do - crikey I am turning senile!

Other news - well the good weather has finally broken up here, as last night we had a really bad storm with high winds. Now this wouldn't usually bother me when I used to be in my cosy terraced house which was conveniently situated in a weather resistant dip - but now I am in a 2nd floor flat - it was slightly more scary!

As it has turned colder I did purchase a new pair of gloves on the weekend which are fab. They are fingerless gloves, but have an extra piece on the top which is secured by a little button, and when you undo it the extra bit folds down and they turn into mittens - how cool is that? The only thing missing is the string to go around your neck and then down your coat sleeves to avoid loosing them - but hey you can't have everything!

I also purchased a new woollen hat, a basic boring, plainly knitted pull-on hat - and it cost me £10! So Amerie there is a definite business opportunity for you there!!! you'd make a mint with your talent!

On a self-centred note -I'm still feeling poorly so it's back to the Doctors tomorrow All of my colleagues in Uni are fed up with my constant coughing, so I have been ordered to go back to the Health Centre (which is an intriguing word as everyone who visits the "Centre" is unhealthy!) for a second opinion.

OK I'd best end here - I will end with an amusing quote about television (well it amused me anyway - enjoy!)

"I watched Countdown once and got aroused. It's only seven letters" - Barry Cryer

I'm back thanks to Sat. Nav!

Yes folks I am back! and it's all thanks to one of these creations from God aka Satellite Navigation. For a women with so little directional knowledge as me, these things are a must and now I feel confident to travel home in the knowledge that I will actually get there :)

Anyway, my trip home was fab, only hindered by the fact that I still have this horrid viral infection which is still causing me sleep deprivation and constant wheezing - but hey ho it could be worse I could have some sort of terminal illness - see I'm starting to be more optimistic in my old age.

I did actually type a longish summary of my trip home on Thursday, but as ever it crashed, so here's a precis.

Friday - Managed to get a seat to myself on the train home, can't think why? constant coughing may have been a factor? My Nieces and Nephew were unaware of my arrival so seeing 3 pairs of very large eyes staring out of the back of the car was cute. Even more spookily they were in total shock and were momentarily silent all the way home - this did not last! The worst thing was, poor Kaci who is 4 thought I was moving in for good - ah bless!

Saturday - Travelled over to my parents armed with a bouquet of flowers for my Mum and a £5K repayment of loan cheque for my Dad. Both were surprised and shocked to see me and we all managed to have a civilised conversation. I realised that after being 5 weeks away from home this was the longest length of time that they hadn't seen me in all of my 37 years on the planet - can't work out whether that makes me a good daughter or a sad individual? In the evening I was supposed to be hitting the town with my sister and her friend Jo, but due to illness we got a Chinese and watched the X-Factor instead - joy!

Sunday - Went to Cyfartha Park in Merthyr Tydfil with the kids and Sis. Had a great time in the park on the swings and the slide - think the kids liked it too ;) It was nice to have some fresh air and run around for a bit after being stuck in the flat on sick leave for over a week. In the evening was invited to dinner at Math and Les' house where chief chef Math surpassed himself yet again with a gorgeous lamb dinner - I have missed my Sunday dinner gatecrashing! It was good to see the kids as well Mali made me a welcome "briefly" back card - bless!.

Monday - Mad day. Went to Cardiff and saw my last supervisor Angie, was good to see her and have a chat, she made me feel a bit happier about how I am handling the work at Hudds. Then met Anne-Marie and Katharine for lunch which turned into a coffee and muffin, due to bad menu/ no chef problems. Georgia joined us briefly due to an inefficient receptionist at her work - but it was great to see her and her new hairstyle. I am still in amazement of Amerie's knitting abilities and only wish I was in Norwich for tuition. In the evening I met up with the "Girls" at the Maenllwyd. Unfortunately due to a communication breakdown I didn't pick Sharon up which made her bad day worse - whoops! However, a good time was had by all, my only grievance with the meal was the small portions, so when I got home I had to get out the Crunchy Nut Cornflakes - I am Little Miss Greedy!

Tuesday - Last full day. Had to sort out my car in the morning new tyre, tracking etc then did a bit of shopping. My parents came over in the afternoon and I cooked tea. After reading bedtime story to the girls (Sleeping Beauty - with voices and actions!) I settled down to watch some TV with Jane, but I was thinking about the long drive home the next day :(

Wednesday - Got up early to say goodbye to the kids before school - had a bit of a moment but recovered as I know I will be back home in just over 4 weeks :) As I hadn't given the Sat. Nav. a test run I was a bit concerned using it for the first time, but my fears were unfounded it was fab. Even when I decided to ignore the voice and went the wrong way - it got me back on track. I managed to get home in 4.40 hours and that's with 2 stops - amazing!

I think my trip home did me a lot of good as even though it was great seeing everyone again, nothing has actually changed since I left. I don't know what I was expecting to change but I felt I was missing out on something - but actually everything I need is here in Hudds and going home is only 4.40 hours away, with 2 stops! As Amerie pointed out when we met up for "lunch" , both her and Katharine live on another Continent, they do not have the luxury of popping home to see their friends and families- so what have I got to worry about? (she's a wise old bird!). So there you have it.

Since I've been back things are back to normal - loads of reading and meetings with my supervisor. I have found out that I am going to a data session in London on Dec. 18th at UCL but after that I can come home :) so I should be in Wales on the 19th until Jan. 8th :) I am really looking forward to it already, just a few assignmentsto get done before I leave.

So that's my catch up entry. No quote today as I couldn't find one concerning Sat. Nav. but I am sure my next edition will contain something quote-worthy!

Inhaling milky bars.....

OK Matt here's a prime opportunity for some rude comments.....but the picture is supposed to depict an asthma inhaler .. the reason for the picture is that I have been put back on the steroids - so I will be entering the Miss Yorkshire Body Building Competition 2007 - I'll let you know how I get on.
As suspected I have a viral infection, so no antibiotics from the Doc .. but she did say that my asthma has kicked off again (you don't say...so that's why I can't breathe!) hence the medication ...so I'll be doing a lotta sucking this weekend ..... yes Matt there's another one for you on a plate with a knife and fork! ;)

Talking of the weekend, I am all excited as I have just packed my trolley dolly suitcase to come home tomorrow :) whoppeee!!!! It's going to be a fun trip for the poor person who is sat next to me on the 5 hour journey home - but ask me if i care? I just want to get back to God's Country and speak to normal people for a few days.

Another good piece of news that has lifted my mood is - my house has finally completed and I have the cash in the bank - so the Milky Bars are on me!!! It was so nice to see a healthy balance for 10 mins until I started to pay all my debts and now it's all looking a bit sick again ... hey ho such is life - and all of that!

I will end with a fab quote about money which seemed all too familiar -

"I'm overdrawn at the bank. I won't say how much, but if you saw it written down, you'd think it was a sex chatline number"
- Julie Burchill

R.I.P. Dawny ...

It's official.... I have died. Well when I say died, I should really use the present continuous - I am dying! My chest infection has not improved and after week of surviving on two hours sleep every day I am like the walking dead :(

I think I can now sympathise with new Mother's - I don't know how they do it. I have got a Doctor's appointment for later on this morning, if she doesn't give me antibiotics - I will kill her with my bare hands, oh yey and this art my pledge!

To be continued ......

Still ill but cooking ...

Just a quicky today to say that I am still ill ... a chest infection has struck with avengence ..so between barking, I thought I would fill you in with two bits of news.

Firstly I successfully cooked an edible meal last night. This may not seem earth shattering to the usual man on the street, but for me it was a breakthrough! I think I have finally managed to work out how to cook on a halogen hob and work the oven .. hoorah! My gastronomic masterpiece was chilli beef stuffed peppers which was lush, even if I do say so myself! :)

The second piece of news is that I've just discovered that my next door neighbour has a set of steel drums in his flat, and on a Monday afternoon he gives out lessons. Now at this point I bet you are thinking .... Dawny is about to go into a rant, but no, I actually like to listen to his student practising. Today we had "Silent Night" and "Yellow Bird", which were fab.....it makes you feel like you are sitting on a beach on a Caribbean island, but then you start coughing and realise that it's all a dream! Anyway, I'd rather listen to that than the Elephant Man upstairs pacing up and down, slamming cupboards etc.... I am thinking of buying him a pair of padded slippers and a "DIY Ballet" DVD and leaving them outside his door...as a bit of a hint.

I just hope that tonight there will be a stop to the fireworks. I love them and I like nothing more than standing in a cold muddy field with my solitary sparkler, joining in with the chorus of "Ooo's" and "Ahh's" .... but for the last two nights I have had 6 hours of fireworks.... which for any lover of Bonfire night is a bit OTT !

On a sadder note...... Sainsbury's have moved the toilet rolls into the pet food section! Lord knows why, but it was very traumatic today trying to buy my pack of four and having to pass the cat food :( I think I will write and complain.

On a happier note....good to see the boys did well at the rugby, I know it was a draw but I was still proud. I felt even better when I saw that NZ thrashed England :) It's a shame I was not in work today to rub my fellow colleagues noses in it... ah well I am sure it will keep.

Cough, Cough ....Wheeze!

Well it was only a matter of time before I got a chest infection ... I think it may have something to do with it being -2 degrees outside and like a raging inferno of 85 degrees in my flat (due to a thermostat which has 2 settings - boiling and tropical heatwave). But hey ... it will pass, but why does it have to happen at the weekend???

Anyway, today I finally exchanged on my house sale after I lost the plot with my purchaser. My conversation this morning evolved into a total slagging match in which I lost my voice...which is not good when you are trying to put your point accross! Anyway, I should be in funds next Thurs/Fri :)

Tomorrow I am going for the chop...no not some type of northern decapitation....I am booked in for a haircut...at Toni & Guy no less....Before you say oh my word how can a student afford that?...I am booked in with the junior stylist's junior, aka the cleaner ...so I'll let you know how it goes....

Off to bed now as my chest and lungs have got together and decided to pull a little prank on me and not work in harmony ... so I am going to recuperate under the comfort of my duvet. Here's a quote any of you gals can use on your man upon the occassion of "man-flu"...

"How to tell the difference between cold and flu: if there's a £50 note in the middle of a field and you can reach it, you haven't got flu"
- Diana Wainman

Fast Food Freak Show!

I need to share with you an experience I had from yesterday.....which involves my favourite subject....food!

I have finally found a fish and chip shop in the High Street (hoorah!) but was dismayed to note on the menu "Fish Tea-Cake"..... Now my recollection of a tea-cake is a small bun like item which has currants and is served preferably toasted with lots of butter on. So I was slightly concerned as to where the connection with battered cod came in....

Luckily for my curiosity, the guy in front of me in the queue ordered the item in question and I was relieved to see that the "tea-cake" is actually a large buttered bap - although it was still a little strange to see a big piece of fish sticking out of it! Anyway, I wimped out and just ordered a bag of chips ... only to be told that they didn't do bags....only cartons ... oh the hardship of cross cultural communication!

I will leave the description of the potato/cheese and mushy pea fritters until another occassion as it's lunchtime and the thought of them makes me feel a bit queasy!

Anyway, yesterday was seminar day followed by a trip to the pub, which is always welcomed. I managed to have a good natter with Rachel and Lisa (the MA girls) and relayed my story about my date that never happened. They agreed with my course of action as they commented that "he sounds like a right nutter", so it was nice to know that the localised opinion was the same as back home. I also spoke again to Matt my fellow PhD student who I thought was just a The Smiths fan...oh no...he only likes Japan..... well that's my next husband sorted out! (JOKE!)

Unfortunately, the night was spoilt as I managed to loose my office keys on the way home ...which didn't go down too well with the girls in the office this morning ... Lord knows where they are..but to make it worse, my Welsh flag key ring was attached to them ... not good!

So the only highlight of today has been a fire alarm.....but false alarm and no firemen so a wasted 10 minute stand in the cold :(

Ciao for now........ back to the grindstone :( Apologies for any spelling errors as I couldn't get the spelling checker to work, so I've posted without checking it as that's the type of reckless gal I am!

Good news ....weird news....no bad news!

Congratulations Anne-Marie on your news! News which I can't say anything about as it's top secret.... and doesn't involve the pitter patter of tiny feet..unless it's kitty feet? Thought this pic was appropriate even though it's hard to think about cats...but I must be strong and move on.... Anyway when I know I can talk about the news I will..... I doubt if anyone in Louisiana will read my blog..but you never know! Anyway I am very proud if you mate, as Brucie would say "didn't she do well" (ask Eamonn!)

So that's the good news ... more good news... The Shahwan's are doing well with new baby Logan, which I think is the coolest name ever! Photo's have been exchanged, but I didn't think it appropriate to publish them on here without parental consent...but take my word for it reader...he's bloody gorgeous! I have already lined up my niece as his future wife, as I think they would produce beautiful children together ... I see no problem in planning ahead!

Weird news..... I didn't broadcast this too widely ... actually only Sharron, Amerie and my sister knew ...but I got asked out on a date on Saturday! ... I'll just wait for a few moments while you get back up off the floor....

Up yet?..... nope?....

OK now?......I'll continue....

I met a guy in an art exhibition in my local library ...he's an artist (spookily enough) ... cutting a long story short (yes I've had complaints my blog is too long!) he asked me out for a drink which was supposed to be tonight, but I postponed until Thursday...so what's so weird? I hear to ask ...

Well.....this guy seemed quite normal for his age, as in divorced with baggage (or buggage as my sister called it tonight which I think is a fab new word) but on Saturday night I had 10 e-mails...followed on Sunday by a 2 hour phone call.....followed yesterday by another phone call and today by 2 texts (!).

Now I personally agree with using all forms of communication to the max...but don't you agree that this was a bit "full on?" Within the framework of this influx of messages were the following comments ...

"I've told my friends all about you I can't wait for you to meet them" (scary)

"If we had moved further down the line I could pop over and help you with your work" (scarier)

"Maybe we could go on holiday together" (scariest - bail out time!)

So my dilemma was: do I meet him on Thursday for a drink then ring him on Friday to say, I don't think so....but then he might think it's because he has BO or bad teeth?
OR
Do I ring him tonight, tell him it's not him , it's me...I am too busy to have a "relationship" right now etc and so forth.

In times of a dilemma...always phone a friend....so I rang Claire....cos she's the only one who answered (only joking mate you are always my first port of call in a crisis!) I told Claire the whole story, we deliberated, procrastinated and various other words I can't spell with "ated" at the end...and her advise was..."He sounds weird...bin him" ... so that's what I did.

He took it OK...but did the we can still be friends and I will still e-mail you thing which is not a great result, as I have enough friends to e-mail / call ..... but I am glad to say that I watched the Yorkshire news tonight and there were not any bodies washed up in the canal, so I think he's OK.

So this experience has made me reconsider the whole relationship thing. Those of you who know me well will recall that I have spent many years a singleton, trawling the internet for a "real live one" ... but have yet to meet Mr Right- but do I really want to go out with just anyone or am I being totally unrealistic in waiting for thunder bolt time? I have decided to give it all a bit of a rest and concentrate on my new life in Hudds ... after all you never know who's on the next barge down d'canal!

So I will end here with very appropriate quote for today, which refers not only to relationships ...but is also dedicated to Anne-Marie for reasons which I can't say...but now everyone will really get suspicious! Enjoy...

"If you really like a girl and she says "I love you like a brother", suggest a weekend in Norfolk - unless you are from Norfolk in which case you probably are her brother"
- Jimmy Carr